edvard kiss munch

Okay so caesar and i were talking about this last night.
about writing (heapos;s a writer ((he also cooks)) proof that: DReams DO come truelol)
and he is trying to journal everyday... And i have also decided to do so myself...
My topic today?
COllege....


Modesto Junior college: My review
...sucks
the end.


To say its "different" is completely underestimating the Grand amount of Different that it actually is for me i guess i could say i Hate it but really i dont. Its easy, simple, and whiout too many complications.
Walking in the first day i was absolutely terrified, not for the homework but for the fact that for once in my whole entire life i was completely alone. No friends among a 16000 student crowd...what was i supposed to do? once the first week was through though i decided that i COUld do it, well...more Like i HAD to do it, i HAD to survive, there was really no other option, but i guess until the moment of this decision i had somehow burried a small hope that maybe this wasnapos;t really going to happen..i really didnapos;t have to be here.
but its been a Forever long period of 8 weeks and i feel comfortable there. A comfortable seemilgy forced upon me a inevitable comfortable. Iapos;ve gone from one extreme to another, my whole life iapos;ve been cared for, iapos;ve been a worry to someone, iapos;ve been noticed by a teacher, a friend, or family, no matter who but i have been something to someone. This new transition to college brought me to the next extreme. A careless girl walking a could-care-less campus. On my own wondering from class to class, a routine so strict and free... Its odd i know but i wouldnapos;t know any other way to explain it.
i figure its only a year till i get a social life back. And i have caesar .... Iapos;m still trying to figure out if choosing him was ever my choice at all? was it really Godapos;s way of making college and life easier? of reviving me and letting me know "hey, be happy, be alive"
i think this new found realization of life beyond MAA has brought me a sense of contentment i would have never expected under my current situation.
but really, going through what iapos;ve gone through in my recent past, iapos;ve learned that only thing you can do with life is deal. You got no choice, well you have the cowards choice to call it all quits, but iapos;ve never really been pro-coward...i am dealing with life and the hardships and blessings just the same.
so this year is gonna be my year that when it comes to school i must simply...Deal.
hearts;
edvard kiss munch, edvard home munch, edvard history munch, edvard hagerup grieg.